I would like an awards dinner in my honor this year. I have changed upwards of 3000 diapers, made more than 200 lunches, driven over 400 carpools, kissed and bandaged countless owies and boo-boos, washed sinkload after sinkload of dishes, folded basket after basket of laundry, read the same “Dora the Explorer” book ad nauseum and listened to the Miami Boys Choir CD in the car so many times that it is the soundtrack to my dreams. I have mothered and wifed and given nearly ever ounce of my being to my family and I think it’s time for some recognition.
Don’t get me wrong, my family thanks me, genuinely, for the efforts I put in on our homefront. I get my hugs and kisses, the occasional bouquet of flowers, the Mothers’ Day cards and every now and then I am even rewarded with a visit to the bathroom on my own (hey, I’m a big kid now!), but I think it’s time that the world at large woke up and gave props to my, and all other stay-at-homers’, contribution to society. (For the record, I would like to say that I am wholly supportive of women who go back to work, for whatever reason, and do not for a second consider them “part-timers,” nor do I think the quality of their mothering is inferior in anyway – different strokes for different folks is fine by me.) What contribution, you may ask. The contribution of four fabulous kids who will, please G-d, continue to be well adjusted, upstanding members of the Jewish community, as well as society at large.
There are always gala dinners for people who donate large amounts of money or time to charity. I give both, in spades, to my children. Mention is always made for those humanitarians who enable peace in war-torn countries. Well, I have brokered many a peace treaty between my warring children, restored democracy to the toy bin and established peaceful borders between hostile boy and girl zones. People applaud those who fight for the rights to free speech and civil liberties and freedoms. Then surely I deserve applause for allowing my son to tell me exactly what he thought of dinner last night and allowing my five year old to go to the doctor’s office dressed like a princess because it was her birthday and she needed to express that to the world. I am a champion of human rights, a politician to be reckoned with, a patron of the arts (and crafts), and a devoted wife and mother. While my arena may be private, and my cause personal, I assure you that I give no less to it than those in the public arena with a more global cause. But now that I’ve put it writing, I see that perhaps an award dinner is a bit much to ask. A star on the walk of fame should do just fine instead.
