Posted February 1 2008
Sing-a-long with Bob Dylan and other Reform Prayer Services
A couple of weeks ago, my elderly parents (both in their upper eighties) went to their Reform temple (they do not call it a synagogue) for Friday evening services. My parents are devoted and involved members of the Reform movement. My dad was President of the temple and my mother served on numerous committees, including Temple Services. They were, in healthier days, regular attendees of activities and religious services. Last Friday their Reform temple was offering “A unique Shabbat Experience - in a variety of flavors and forms!” My Mom explained to me that this was a new Friday night event that Reform temples all over the United States were adopting to improve attendance and attract members to their services. It even has a name. It is SYNAPLEX; Choices, Connections, Community. You know, like your friendly neighborhood CINAPLEX, where you get to choose which of a number of movies you can see. At SYNAPLEX, the temple experience, you get to choose how you want to bring in Shabbos. Here are the choices that my parents had:
CATERED DINNER – Reservations required
KABBALOT SHABBAT SESSIONS
1. Embracing The Mood, Music and Prayers of Shabbat
2. Bringing the Shabbat Psalms to Life
3. Jewish Heroes and Superheroes
4. Our Moral Obligations (please bring 1 canned food item)
SERVICES AND STUDY
1. Healing Service
2. The Call of the 70’s: A Service of Song and Action
3. Jewish Music and How It Touches the Soul
ONEG
Mom and Dad attended only Services and Study, number 2, The Call of 70’s. An interesting choice for them, but since it was the senior Rabbi leading this, my folks felt more comfortable with him and his guitar. Although at first my Mom had complained to me that all she wanted to do was have “regular” services, after attending she was raving about how lovely it all was. “So many people. Lots of kids. It was wonderful and we sang such nice songs about peace.” Since leaving the Reform movement I try to be very careful when talking to my parents about the Reform movement. I was very cautious and told my Mom that I was glad that she had a good time. Her response was remarkable: “Temples all over the country are doing this because we have to change with the times.”
“Okay,” I reply “glad that you and Dad enjoyed the evening.”
It could have been left at that until she sent me the program (see above) and encouraged me to show it to our board because, she explained, it will help increase attendance, etc.
Being a very non-confrontational type of person I will not bring up the issue again to my Mom and Dad, but because I was offended, for lack of a better term, I decided to post my feelings on this subject of “changing with the times.”
The first time I went to traditional services I felt like I was in a foreign country. Over time and repetition I became, not only comfortable, but comforted by the prayers and melodies of our forefathers and mothers. I felt connected to my past for the first time.
Over these last 30 years I have tried to continue to grow and accept mitzvoth that are meaningful to me because I have learned of their importance in keeping our people together throughout the centuries. It is our continuation of these rituals and mitzvoth that has kept Judaism alive through very trying times and tyrants.
Changing with the times to attract a secular minded community is exactly what I wanted to leave. The idea that you have to offer a multitude of options instead of just a warm, traditional prayer service to increase attendance is, to my way of thinking, misguided in the extreme. When you try to be all things to all people, you end up being nothing to nobody.
Add This Blog to Your Technorati Favorites
Jewish Blog, Jewish, Jewish Leadership, Jewish News, Jewish Values, Jewish Events
To be fair, many people decry the boredom and repetition of even Orthodox prayer. I do not blame people looking for something more exciting. However, I have met few people who had a positive childhood experience in their synagogue, with rabbis and teachers who inspired and answered their questions, and who are still looking for a change. Those who got it right the first time seem to have no desire to “change with the times.” Unfortunately, most of the people I have met who have shrunk (instead of grown) in their religious observance have blamed a poor explanation of the meaning of Judaism’s basic tenets, a refusal to answer questions, or a denial of meaning vs. ritual (action without thought). For these people, the “old way” is boring, uninformed, and meaningless. They indeed should change with the times - to an inspiring and meaningful service that harkens back to what our forefathers felt. If it doesn’t feel like God is in the synagogue with you, then maybe it’s time to start hanging out in the one He goes to.